I’m being more and more convinced

that one’s inner state

has nothing to do

with one’s outer fate.

 

I can only explain

this run of tranquility

as a sweet gift from God-

sunlight amidst catastrophe.

 

I’ve been trying to figure this out-

this euphoric new freedom.

only to see the answer

scatter in the rainy season.

 

Sunlight splashes everywhere like a child.

 

I dash everywhere,

like a madman,

searching for the cause of this bliss

but every street is a near miss.

 

I thought I saw

a pair of gleaming green eyes

down India street

about sunrise.

 

’twas a hunchbacked thing,

dressed in fluffy shadow,

beckoning me on

over puddles, into the shallows,

’til the sight of my feet were gone.

 

My ability to live

had been greatly diminished,

but my desire to do so?

Well, I just know I ain’t finished.

 

It happened, somewhere these past two weeks

where a great terrible burden was lifted.

I just sorta woke up one day, free of fear-

of living, of dying, of you drawing near.

 

I remembered that I couldn’t remember

how to swim and my arms became jelly-

i’ve followed my hopes into the depths

only to find no answer.

 

My breath and my feet

have been bouncing on the street;

Oh, my breath and my feet

be pounding on the street.

 

The fatigue last up and left

like a dark breeze.

Now I’m wondering if i’ve been cured,

of this terrible disease.

 

I can see things in the clouds again.

 

I went hiking the other day

and I swear, the leaves whispered-

‘you’re gonna be ok,’

words from my almighty shephard